Thursday, February 7, 2013

Mckinlee 2 Years Old

My sweet Mckinlee,

Today is your 2nd birthday.  You are already 2 whole years old.  I step back while watching you play and wonder how so much time has passed since you were born.  I swear you were just my sweet, brand new baby yesterday.  You bring me so much joy, and I hate that the years of your "babyhood" are slipping by so quickly.  I wish with everything in me that I could keep you tiny enough to sit in my lap for forever, yet I dream daily of the woman you will one day be.  Motherhood is tricky like that.  You will always be my baby, and it hurts me to watch you grow, but at the same time that growth brings me so much excitement.  It is so exciting to watch you come alive.  The real you. The you that has always been there waiting patiently to make her debut.  Gone are the sweet innocent baby days, and here are the wild, testing, hilarious toddler days.  You are so amazing, you really really are. You my sweet one could move mountains.  God gave you a spit fire personality that I am positive will take you places in this world.  You are the perfect mix of feisty and sweet.  You have a way of standing your ground, and really fighting for what you want. Though this is testing at times, I know that it is a great quality. It assures me that you will always fight for what you believe in which is so important. That quality combined with the loving heart you have is a magical combination.  You are one in a million Mckinlee, and I am so honored and proud to call you my daughter.  

Ever since I was a little girl I have dreamed of having a daughter.  You my tink, are my dream come true.  Through you I get to fulfill my life dream of being a mother to a little girl.  It brings me so much happiness to watch you slowly transition into womanhood.  I love the way you like to put on your "face" while I am doing my makeup.  I crack up at the faces you make in the background as you pretend to put on your eye makeup just like mommy.  My heart literally melts when you ask for a bow for your hair, and watching you twirl in circles when you put on a new outfit makes me smile so big my cheeks hurt.  Through you sweet baby I am experiencing a relationship that I was not fortunate enough to experience, a mother daughter one.  You are my light, and I pray that we will always be close.  I promise you that I will do everything in my power to build you up throughout life.  I will always be here for you to talk, cry with, shop with, run away with on bad days, and dream with.  I will be the person always cheering and supporting you wherever your life leads.  You my sweet girl mean so much to me. It is truly a privilege to be a mother to you and Caleb, and one that I thank God for a thousand times a day.

I know that all to soon you will be all grown up, and that before I know it I will be writing your three year post.  However, right now there are so many memories of you that I want to write in black and white so that I can always remember who you were at 2 years of age.  I do not know that my writing will do the memories justice, but it is my prayer that one day years from now, when you and I may be having a bad day,  that I can look back on this blog entry and smile and remember my sweet baby girl.  After all, you will always be my baby. My sweet, beautiful, feisty  hilarious baby girl who literally stole my heart the moment I saw you.  

Mckinlee at 2 years you wake in the morning calling for me, and when I step to your bed you bounce with excitement.  You reach up your tiny little arms and say "Mommy, I want you" (I want you is all slurred together in the cutest of toddler jabber), and as I lift you, you fall into the bend of my shoulder and rest your head.  I melt every time.  You see, no matter how many times you may have waken me the night before, or how hard the previous day was, I am always ecstatic to see you in the morning, and excited to begin my day with you.  You jabber from the moment I get you out of bed.  You literally never stop talking.  You will practice basically every word of your vocabulary in a melodic form as if you were a composer of words.  It is so cute.  I always want to remember your sweet innocence, and how you love to be naked.  It cracks us up when you have to go potty.  No matter what room you are in, when the urge hits, you drop your pants to your ankles and slowly waddle to the bathroom yelling "Mommy potty".  There is nothing cuter than your wrinkly butt penguin walking across the living room.  It makes me smile.  You are such a ham at this age, and you love to put on a show.  Whether you are dancing, singing, or spinning in circles you like all eyes to be on you.  I love that.  Maybe one day we will see your name in lights?  You love and are annoyed by your brother equally.  You two play so well together, are so compassionate to one another, and fight like cats and dogs at the same time.  He is special though sweet girl.  He will forever be your rock, and will be there one day when your dad and I will no longer be able to.  His relationship is one to forever cherish and hold close. You love to face time with Paw, and your eyes light up so big that they twinkle when you first see his face on the screen. I love that, and I am thankful for technology.  You stand your ground as I mentioned before, and often times you can be very bratty.  However, you look up with those big blue eyes and say "Love you", or run and snuggle me, and melt my heart once again.  It saddens me to discipline you, and it is so hard to when you pull out your tricks, but always know that I discipline because I love you.  You are getting braver and braver about being away from me, and you have been staying in the church nursery throughout services.  I am so proud of you for that.  You are such a little mama.  You love to play with babies.  It amazes me to watch the maternal instinct come out.  You are so sweet with your babies, and so loving. You will make a wonderful mother some day.  Your favorite animals are dogs and quack quacks as you call them.  You are still so tiny, like so so tiny.  It makes you growing up a little easier on my heart because you still look like my baby for now.  I love all 20 lbs of you!! I love that when you are scared or hurt you want me, and I love that I can fix that hurt within moments. I know that one day it will not be so easy to fix, and so I cherish and cling to the moments when mommy is the solution to the problem.  Oh how I wish I could protect you from every hurt and fear in the unpredictable world.  Your favorite show is Dora, you love peanut butter more than any other food, and you copy your brothers every move at this age.  You are stunningly gorgeous.  Every where we go people stop and tell me how beautiful you are. Your blue eyes, and blond curly locks are breathtaking.  It is my prayer that you will be just as beautiful inwardly and you are externally in life.  

Mckinlee, you seriously have my heart.  I pray daily for the girl you are growing into, and the woman that you will one day become.  I pray that God gives you the strength to stand up for what you believe in, the gentleness and compassion to always be there for others, the privilege of one day becoming a mother, and that God will forever be first and foremost in your life.  For now however, I will hold you, kiss your boo boo's, play with you, and tuck you in.  You are my baby today, and that I will never take for granted.  Lets slow down on the growing up okay?

I love you,


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